Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems

My Aunt Ginny sent me the book "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" by Dr. Richard Ferber. It's supposed to be the top resource book for parents looking for advice on how to help their child sleep better - whether that be go to bed without a fuss, sleep through the night, wean them off nighttime feedings or pacifier use, etc. Lily has been pretty good at sleeping through the night since she was 3 months old. The only complaint I have is that in order to fall asleep she must be held and bounced until she drifts off, then you have to gently lay her down in her crib. If she wakes up, you have to start the whole process all over again. Last night, after Lily woke up crying at 2:45am and 4am, I'd had enough. It was time for this little girl to learn to fall asleep on her own! At 4am, I pulled out the book and started reading. Dr. Ferber recommends a variation of the "cry it out" method to break children of being dependent on certain sleep associations. In Lily's case, this was the necessity of bouncing in order to fall asleep. He says children are quick learners, so if you stick to this "progressive-waiting" approach, your child should change their behavior within a period of 7 days. The idea is the child must fall asleep on their OWN, in their OWN crib, with you OUT of the bedroom. So at 4am, I laid Lily down, kissed her goodnight, turned on her crib toy, and left the room. Screaming ensued the minute I stepped outside her door. I was expecting this. The book says to wait 3 minutes before going back in. I sat outside her door, petting Dorothy (the cat) for comfort, and staring at the clock. 3 minutes later, I went back in and spent a minute trying to comfort a screaming Lily without picking her up. I failed (in comforting her, not in picking her up. She stayed firmly planted in her crib!). I gave her back the pacifier (I'm not weaning her of that yet, one thing at a time), she immediately spit it out. Oh well, her loss! Again, I left the room. My hand reached the door knob and her screams got louder. This time I set my alarm clock for 5 minutes. Lily screamed through the whole 5 minutes. Again, I went back in to try and comfort her for a minute. No success. I was determined not to give in. The next waiting period is 7 minutes long. After those 7 minutes, I then had to wait 10 minutes each subsequent time. To pass the time, I continued to read the book, looking for reassurance that what I was doing was the right thing. All the testimonials in the book say the first night is the worst. After an hour of crying and me going to check on her every 10 minutes, she took her pacifier, closed her eyes, and I didn't hear another peep out of her the rest of the night (of course, this was 5am so there wasn't a whole lot of "night" left). All in all, I'd say it was a success. Yes, Lily cried for an hour. Yes, it was hard to listen to. Yes, I'm exhausted, but if this actually works and I don't have to get up at night to put her back to bed, I'm willing to be overly tired for the next few nights. I just put Lily down for a nap and started the whole process over again... checking on her after 3 minutes, then 5 minutes, then 7 minutes.... then NOTHING!!!! She's asleep!!! WOOHOO!!! Now I'm off to take a nice, hot, quiet shower before Lily's 6 month doctor's appointment. This poor girl is going to think I'm torturing her. First, I won't pick her up when she's crying and now I'm taking her to get shots. :`( I'm sorry baby girl, I'm doing it because I love you!

Note: for any new parents out there who might want to try this "progressive-waiting" approach, I highly recommend having a video baby monitor on hand. It was comforting for me to be able to see her while she was screaming her head off. Then I could reassure myself that nothing was truly wrong and that she's just crying because she wants to.